I feel really good. Master was very affectionate, and even scratched me before leaving, and got me all set up. Arcane made me food. I relaxed, and it was very nice. Having things like water and the blanket and stuffed animals made me feel very tangibly taken care of, and that was helpful with avoiding abandonment fears. And knowing concretely and specifically what my night would entail was the same kind of comforting as the hospital.
I'm physically better than I was, but not 100%.
I'm a bit sad, because I was supposed to get to see Mars today, and have all the sexual violence. So that's kind of what my brain was geared up for, and I'm still there. Pin me to a wall and kiss me and bite me and pull my hair and hit me, or fuck me, or.... even a few cane strokes randomly?
I've been there for a few days, I think. The good thing about sexual violence/play is that a little goes a long way, both in intensity of effect, and duration of effect, and it doesn't require aftercare. It also doesn't really require context, or setting energy in the same way as other things. It's a fairly low maintenance, low-risk/high reward kind of thing.
It makes everything better in a sometimes frustrating, disappointing existence.
"Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down?"
I hope Master would be interested in trying that and seeing what it does...
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